I changed my name because most of my focus has shifted, As all encompassing as loz cosplay was and sadly given my health I have retired from cosplay unless it is simple, so my extensive diversity of being anyone or anything I cannot physically do anymore. The moment the changeling cannot shift like they used to is a sad day indeed. An emotional painful pity and deep loss in my mind.

I am almost permanently housebound and therein almost always now online and if I build/create it is for and thru electronic means as that does not make me sick.
There are silver linings I have returned to writing tho electronically, I still create tho electronically, it is harder to have a physical outlet for my creativity but even that I am striving to try to continue even if it cannot be in physical means. I still game but selectively.

On other things my kingdom and fae court is changing I have one here in this realm/real life and one electronically but they are influx and my health affects all these things sadly. 
Coming to grips with ones health is hard and trying to stay active is a fine, tedious and delicate balance.
I will have 2 or 3 days where my energy seems endless and then several weeks were just sitting up and swallowing is so tiring. At the end of april 2016 I went down, but I had been fighting the progress of my health going off the deep end since August 2015, and even now I...I still struggle with this endless battle with my health. Just when I think I have it all figured out a new little thing pops up, given things they were probably always there but I didn't notice for what ever the reason.

I must let go of the past or I will be stuck in those oubliettes forever, I can only do what I can do and at the end of the day I can truly only guide my own paths and make and be responsible for my own choices. That part is hard at times because I am so used to getting in and helping others and guiding their lives. I feel like anyplace with pictures of 2016 and earlier is a capsule of a better time, but that is just emotions talking the reality is even on my worse days even now can be good times, healthy times I just need to keep my focus forward and always positive and not give up.

This is my personal labyrinth I must run, and all choices I make need to take me not to the castle but to the center, to refind myself and as hatty says "my muchness". 
So if you want to find me electronically the send a message unless you already know the places I frequent. 
For all who follow me here, thank you that means a lot over the next while I will upload all my cosplay work here and on facebook and then step away from cosplay unless its a simple thing or for something special that wont affect my health.

I plan on keeping up my D.A.as best as I can because it seems unaffected by the rest of the worlds drama, as well as my wordpress and a few other things but to the rest of it I am saying goodbye and not looking back.

For those who read this thank you, for those who like and follow thank you, and for those of you just plain up bored I get it and remember to hold tight to each moment you have because you only get one of each of those moments and then they are gone. Who knows what the rest of this day holds but come what may I will greet it with positivity and what ever spoons I can muster.

My love to you all...

*Rubs face in hands and lets out a long breath*

After A year and a half of feeling endelessy depressed and losing my self in imvu I finally am getting my head out of my emotional butt and stopping feeling like I have nothing left to live for because of the deterioration of my health. 

I forget that there are people in my life who are influenced by my actions, my choices and in turn they influence me. 
Imvu has helped me be able to create again and honestly I never ever thought I would be able to build once more.

I forgot what it felt like to be alive, because I unbeknownst to myself signed myself to a very miserable lonely existence the more things I lost, the ability to eat or do til finally I became a hermit terrified of everything.

That's no way to live, that's not a life that's not even a half life. I am ashamed I let myself drown and give up hope. I had forgotten people cared and that they were there for me as I had always been there for them. 

I met people in imvu that had I not been sick I would have never met, If I had not lost my facebook I would have never met. There were good people and bad people but you meet that everywhere, no matter the social media venue.

Today I am choosing to hold my head high and keep going forward, no I can't walk down the street yet...but I will.
I have a wonderful community of friends, my chosen family and some my actual family that carry me thru all this issues with my health, mcs sucks, tilt sucks, celios sucks, hypertension mobility sucks, but I am not going back to where I was even 2 days ago I won't allow my self to drown again I won't allow myself to lose faith in me. 
Besides I know several of those dear friends who will kick my ass of I disappear again. I'm looking at you KhaleesiKiyiya-Wolf  , but she's not the only one, her, Seigun, dndgeekgirl, They ain't letting my ass be miserable. They embody what I need to remember on how much I am loved and supported in all this. My beloved muses, my inspirations, the ones who remind me life is the greatest adventure! 

Thank you for caring and supporting me thru all this whether I just met you and your have deeply impacted my life or I've know you for years and you continue to deeply impact me. You all mean so bloody much to me and I care and love you all with all my heart.

If media is all I got to love on all of you as you love on and support me then damn it I will get my ass back to being active again and live once more vibrantly and abet carefully because of my health.
I miss you all and I am so sorry I gave up hope, that I let my self drown in my depression, fear and loss.
My love to you all.
Loz/Jareth

I really want no one to blame me for walking away but I know they will.
 
This is the first journal I've written in 3 years funny that. WOW has my world changed in 3 years. 
In a 1/2 hr my morning will start and I may or may not make it to con depends on my body and my needs. 
But then I rare sleep at night anymore. I sleep for a couple hrs during the day then go about my day.

This day might seem like It will go on forever but I know It will be just another day. So I'm afraid and excited non the less.
Go Norwescon 2016 and the dance. Just wish I was feeling better, Such a Pity!

Well I found out my premium membership is up at the beginning of June, this very much saddens me but you know what that's life.


I fell into Mr. Gold and Rumpelstiltskin from once upon a time. So now I have built both characters.

I had the honor and privileged to work with and who have phenomenal abilities cosplaying and is a mind blowing photographer, He gets right into his subjects heads!


So I premiered Rumpelstiltskin after 36 to 40 hrs of work. on the spot make up job, had not been pretested and crimped my hair but it didn't hold. He was an instant success, after 4 hrs of hard play he was still doing great, the dublet is tight but looks good and there's just something about this character that shows my true colours and thoughts more often then not. The whole Mr Gold/Rumplestiltskin premier turned out waaaay better then expected.

Stoic one moment and bat shit crazy the next, with a bit of dark violent intensity thrown in for good measure.


I must say out of it came a Once Upon a Time FB group WAAAAAAY cool, and there's a very awesome Regina, that I got to do picks with a couple of days ago. And now everyone wants Rumpelstiltskin! *freaks out and runs away to the goblin kingdom.*

I must be crazy to take on these challenges of these anti-heros, honestly I would have never looked rumples way if it had not been for my fellow deviante and yakumite After being called, texted and verbally XD harassed XD that in no way shape or form was I allowed to refuse to be Rumplestiltskin cause after seeing him on screeen was like liiiiiink you must play him you have no choice, I was like ...............................................................................................ok.

On a way cool side note not that this isn't already awesome stuff, I did an epic sunset link shoot with and I'm working for him!!!!! He has got to be one of the best bosses I know, but don't tell him I said so XD. has such a way of catching his subjects in that perfect moment.

So please go check out the awesome people I now work with XD!!!!!!







Nuff said gonna upload pics asap, it will be done XD hope you all enjoy. Big hugs gang! your always Link/Jareth/ and Rumple

i am so stoked, there are new dark link pics and new jareth pics as well as puss in boot pics and pics of my cross plays!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pics, pics, pics, pics boooooyah! cannot wait to upload and share. oh a new commissions for leather working and link stuff! woot it feels so good to be back!